10 things we’d like to ask Alexa’s NHS skill

Following the announcement of a partnership between the NHS and Amazon for Alexa to be used to give medical advice, we’ve come up with several things we’d like to ask Alexa, and speculate on the replies it might give.

Here are 10 of them:

Query: Alexa, it feels like I have a steering wheel in my underpants.

Answer: It must be driving you nuts.

 

Query: Alexa, I feel like a pair of curtains.

Answer: Pull yourself together.

 

Query: Alexa, I feel like I’m Robert Palmer.

Answer: Are you addicted to love?

Query: No, I’ve got a bad case of loving you…

 

Query: Alexa, it feels like I’ve swallowed a golf ball

Answer: It must have gone down a fair way.

 

Query: Alexa, I’ve got heartburn after eating a birthday cake.

Answer: Next time, have it without the candles.

 

Query: Alexa, I think I’m a witch.

Answer: No, you’re just having a dizzy spell.

 

Query: Alexa, I’m suffering from Insomnia.

Answer: Try sleeping on the edge of the mattress. You’ll soon drop off.

 

Query: Alexa, I feel like a pack of cards.

Answer: I’ll deal with you later.

 

Query: Alex, I’ve got a bad case of wind.

Answer: Here’s a kite.

 

Query: Alex, I think I’ve got memory problems, when did this happen?

Answer: When did what happen?


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